Douglas Haidet
1/5
If it helps one person, writing this is good enough. No agency is perfect but sometimes they miss the mark and should be called out.
They are nice at first, but beware, they will tell you, "The best way to navigate a home study is to lean on other adoptive families and the adoption community, ask them questions, and get their thoughts." The transparent talk we all know and love builds a trusting relationship. We confirmed we were already doing that and even provided them with examples of which types of adoption community members, and they said, "Great!" This agency also ends emails with, "If you have any questions, please ask," and encourages questions. Plus, we not only liked our social worker, but we honestly could have seen her as a real friend stopping by after the adoption and hanging out with us. However, it all changed when we took the above words to heart.
We asked other adoptive professionals, who are part of the adoption community, for a second opinion when the agency tried to pressure us with a non-USCI requirement and because they would not answer our questions and concerns. They were upfront about their request not being a requirement by the USCI. After we declined because they would not answer our questions, numerous times they stated, "It would just be easier if you said yes." We asked for the director while there to explain our declination, but they were too busy.
We should not have asked questions (or at least nothing that questions them). After a verbal conversation, they emailed about wanting to continue the partnership and had a solution. We were excited! However, their email was not specific in one area. We asked them if we still agreed on the parameters since they were unclear in their email. Of course, we wanted specifics in writing since it was a mutual agreement to move forward. In the same exchange, we stated we did not care for how we were recently treated. It is explicitly written in their contract that they will not retaliate and welcome anyone to express any concerns with how the agency is treating them. We did and were immediately dismissed. There was no call or anything to discuss how we were treated; it was just an email stating they were dismissing us because they felt we no longer trusted them (though we did state we trusted our social worker specifically) and because we contacted other adoption professionals for a second opinion.
Once we sent in a formal complaint, they tried to twist what happened, stating we were putting "limitations" on them about the agreement when it seemed they were initially agreeable (while we have most interactions with the agency recorded, please ensure you lawfully record every single interaction with them). If they had a different understanding of the agreement, all they had to do was say so. That is why we asked! Before the final email, we also asked numerous times in writing and verbally about their policies/processes regarding their request and what happens if something does not go to plan, but, of course, the questions were never answered.
It raises eyebrows and is a red flag when an agency is upset that their clients reach out for a second opinion, especially after the agency admits that the USCI did not require their request and that there are other options to achieve their wants (which we agreed to all of the alternatives). By the way, they said we passed all the requirements of the USCI. We wanted transparency, and questions answered, none of which was provided.
You will do great with this agency if you are willing to do whatever they want blindly. Choose another agency if you know the requirements and will not just believe what they say. We have since found a new agency; the transparency is night and day and is upfront. No question has been left unanswered, which is the most important thing we want, along with honesty, with an agency relationship.
